BUSY WEEKEND

Usually Friday is my favorite day of the week, which says a lot about how the anticipation of something is at times more important than the event, because I do work on Fridays....but it's so nice to look forward to the weekend.

But, first a word about Aunt Loraine's funeral. It was held at the Funeral Home in Oro Valley. Her daughter Carol had gathered pictures from Aunt Loraine's life and the Funeral Home scanned them and made a slide show. Carol's husband Brad selected the music. It was really nice to see her life in pictures. If you knew her, you know she was really pretty and there were some beautiful pictures of her and Uncle Don. They made quite the beautiful couple.
The majority of the people at the service were friends of ours that have made friends with Aunt Loraine and Uncle Don over the 9 years that they have been here. It meant a lot to see them supporting us. Uncle volunteers at Catalina State Park 3 days a week and many of the volunteers and employees attended. One guy got up to speak about Aunt Loraine saying how much he enjoyed her smile.
There were also friends from their Wednesday night "Applebee's" group. They have been meeting every week for years.
There was also neighbors and church members. Our friend Mary Strzalka got up and shared a nice story about Aunt Loraine.
Afterwards there were some refreshments and a time to chat with everyone. I think Uncle enjoyed it (as much as you can).
Friday nights have been 'Happy Hour' at Uncle's for years. Aunt always supplied the snacks and drinks and we enjoyed sitting outside on their patio. Bella and Lola always enjoyed feeding the birds, watering the flowers; Lola loved to dance to the singing bass fish that hangs in the garage. She'd say "come on GeeGee" and start dancing. We will miss all of this, but we won't let it go away completely. Tonight, me, Ken, Bella, Justen and many of our friends are going to Uncle's for 'Happy Hour'. We'll be taking the snacks and perhaps a few drinks to try to keep it going. Things change, but the joys of life will continue.

Tomorrow morning I will help Carol go through Aunt Loraine's clothes/things and pack up what she doesn't want. Not something I'm looking forward to, but I will make it as positive as possible. Sometimes you find out things you never knew about the person. It happened to my mom, me and my sister when we went through my grandmother's things. That's a long story but some shocking information.

On Sunday, I have to come in to work for a Computer Downtime at 5 AM. Not being a morning person, not looking forward to it. Maybe I can take a nap later.
But tonight will be fun...Bella is spending the night and I love spending time with her. I'm hoping I have enough time to make homemade blueberry muffins.

One day at a time

It's a cliche that is used so often, probably because that's truly what you do. It's all you can do. Yesterday I had the blues really bad, the achy feeling that I really think is your heart hurting, all day. My co-worker, Do, is a really kind- hearted Vietnamese guy and as soon as he walked in my office to say good morning.....I told him my aunt had died and I broke down. Probably because he is family oriented, loves to hear my stories....practically feels like he knows my family and friends.
I hadn't had time to bake Bella's cake last night; Justen and I will buy one; she doesn't care about it being homemade....that's my issue.
Bella wanted a gecko for her Birthday, so after work me, Justen, Ken and Bella are going to Pets Mart. We picked out 'Leo', purchased his home and supplies and decided to stop by Uncle's. Ken had spoken to him earlier in the day and he was just OK and wasn't sure if he was coming over.
Ken had told Bella about Aunt Loraine when he picked her up from school. When we arrived at Uncle's she went to him and hugged him; told him she was sorry about Aunt Loraine. His tears came and he asked her to feed the birds. He cut some carrots for the rabbits.....routine feels good....but oh, it's so different without Aunt. Bella asks, where are the snacks? I explain, Aunt always put the snacks out and we can get some snacks when we get home.
Uncle agrees to come over for a burger and a beer. :)
It all feels so different; I'm going through the motions....I don't have to get the vodka out. I'm reminded of her absence over and over...the little things....I now have an extra hamburger....I don't want Uncle to see it. Usually Uncle would be out on the back patio, but he sits inside. After I do some prep for dinner, I sit with him. He tells me about his day. Going to the funeral home, making many, many calls. He said he was concerned about coming over because he didn't want to cry in front of Bella. He even spoke to his pastor about it and his pastor said no...it's good for children to learn about and see grief.
Bella kept saying she missed Aunt Loraine....she said she was so nice.
Uncle had not eaten since the breakfast he had yesterday with Aunt Loraine. He said it never occurred to him to eat.
I was glad he ate his whole hamburger. We lit the candles on Bella's cake, sang Happy Birthday. Then, time to open presents. As she opened the gifts from Aunt and Uncle, I told her that Aunt Loraine selected them for her yesterday. She folded her hands together in prayer formation and looked up to heaven and said, 'Thank you'. It was so sweet.

Bella making a wish

Bella and 'Leo'

Uncle stayed for a while and then said he wanted to go home. I was so glad he came. The best part is, he is talking openly about what he is going through...so healthy.
His daughter, Carol and her husband Brad are arriving tonight from Cleveland. Ken is picking them up now.
I think the funeral is Tuesday night at 6 PM, but that is not for sure.

Dear Hilarious Aunt Loraine.....we miss you already

Uncle Don and Aunt Loraine

Tax day. Aunt Loraine woke up feeling good. Not that she had been sick, but she has not been as active and wasn't getting out much. She slept late many days, which I plan on doing when I am 78!! She even wanted to go out for breakfast. She and Uncle Don had breakfast out and afterwards she wanted to get something else for Bella's Birthday. Uncle had already bought her a stuffed quail that makes the quail call when you press its' back. On Friday's we usually take Bella over to their house and she loves to feed the quail in their backyard.




They searched and searched for a card with the number '9' on it for her 9th Birthday. They finally found one and Aunt insisted on getting her another gift--- a variety pack that has notepads, pens and a variety of other fun stuff. They got home in time for her to watch her soaps. A while later they had 'happy hour' on the back porch; drinks, a little shrimp cocktail. It was getting to be dinnertime, so she went inside to put the chicken in the oven. She then sat down in her blue recliner. About 15 minutes later, Uncle went in to check on her, he looked over at the chair, and he knew instantly that she was gone. He said he had no doubt. He went and got a cool, wet cloth, put it to her face and said, please don't leave me, trying to wake her.......


The ambulance came and attempted to revive her....took her to the hospital....they tried to revive her, but she was already gone.


As we sat with Uncle at his house afterwards, he talked freely about the day, crying at times, laughing at times. He was concerned about Bella's Birthday party tonight. He went and got the gifts and card. He asked me, how do I sign the card Margie----just Uncle Don. I said no, sign Aunt Loraine too. A few hours before, she had picked out the card and gift. We encouraged him to come tonight, we would pick him up, take him home when he wants to go. He will let us know.


It will be lonely for him, but we plan to keep him busy.


Aunt Loraine had a wonderful sense of humor and was very witty. She would say some of the funniest unforgettable things. She was always good to my sons, and granddaughters. One thing I will never forget about her and has influenced my behavior is, she ALWAYS, ALWAYS, called me (and sometimes sent a card too) to thank me after a party/dinner at our home. She was big about writing thank you notes. It's kind of a lost etiquette and that is sad. There is so much more I could say about her life...and will at some point. I just wanted to honor her life this morning.


Please pray for Uncle Don. I think he will do fine; he has a zest for life; but my gosh, 58 years with someone and one day they aren't there anymore.

Sick day, lazy weekend

I stayed home on Friday...had a fever and sinus pressure and generally felt like I was hit by a truck. I literally stayed in bed all day. I watched "One Fine Day" and "Breakfast at Tiffany's", and napped. As bad as I felt, days like this are not totally miserable. Being lazy and watching movies, napping is kind of enjoyable; as long as it's temporary.

I watched a lot of sports this weekend. With Justen living with us, I am getting in to sports a lot more. We watched the Masters and I thoroughly enjoyed it.

Easter!

Bella came over on Friday night. We went to Catalina State Park. Bella loves to look for bugs, tadpoles, etc. She was really hoping to find some tadpoles. I didn't think she would find any...it has been too cold lately. There is still snow on the mountain and the water running is icy cold. It is warming up though, and there were many gnats buzzing around my face which was really annoying. I absolutely abhor bugs; all of a sudden something was stinging the side of my face. I swatted it and a ugly green bug fell to the ground. Great...now I'm paranoid.
We hiked back to where the water pools, hoping to find some tadpoles, but had no luck. Justen did find a black and yellow bug for her. The hike was absolutley beautiful, very green from all the rain and flowers everywhere. I saw several photographers.
We went home, grilled hamburgers. Justen made sauteed mushrooms and onions in a butter and balsamic..it was fabulous! We had an Easter Basket for Bella. She was very happy with it and told me she loved me. She shared her mini whoppers as we watched an episode of 'Life', the one with tadpoles! Time for bed.

It was a beautiful morning. We had our coffee outside on the patio as Bella played with her bug. I made bacon and oatmeal. Soon it was time for Bella's dad to pick her up. Hugs and kisses.
Time to shop and prepare for tomorrow.
We had our friends over...Larry, Henna, Annie, Bobbie, Denny, Casey, Kim, Uncle Don and Aunt Loraine. Great time, great food, horseshoes, laughs...a beautiful day.

Menu was: Appetizers (thanks Annie and Henna), Grilled Pork Tenderloin w/sour cherry sauce, scalloped potatoes (thanks Annie), Brussel Sprout hash w/caramelized shallots, corn souffle (thanks Aunt Loraine), cole slaw, french bread, a cake log with buttercream frosting (thanks Kim)!!!

Springtime in the desert

I knew it was going to be a beautiful spring in the desert. We had a lot of rain this winter. The contrast of the desert with the beautiful, colorful wildflowers is stunning. Time to enjoy. It won't last long. As soon as it gets really hot, they disappear.

A Little Pink

I found this blog and it has moved me so strongly, I want to share it with you. It is a story of a couple, young, madly in love, newborn daughter. It's not a happy ending, so why would you want to read it. Perhaps because it is important to remind ourselves of how blessed we are; what sacrifices are made on our behalf; how easy it is to be comfortable in our daily lives; how easy it is to be complacent; how easy it is to only think of ourselves and our needs.

http://alittlepinkinaworldofcamo.blogspot.com/